Here are some of the jokes I know :
1. Why was the Egyptian girl confused ?
Because her dad was a mummy !
2.
Once upon a time , there was a very stupid boy named Ali . One day , he went to school and the teacher asked a question and a student answered by saying 'Me , me , me' . Later that day , he went to a restaurant and heard someone saying 'Fork and spoon a fork and spoon' , then he went to the restaurant's toilet and heard someone who was trying to keep the toilet clean saying 'Flush it away' . After that , he went down the street and saw a person giving a present to his sister and when his sister received the present , he heard her saying 'Thank you' . Just when they left , the street had no one on it except for an old lady and him . Suddenly , a crime happened there . The old lady's head was chopped by a robber who wanted her expensive necklace . Five minutes later when the robber has escaped , the police came . The police officer said 'Does anyone here knows what happened just now ?' . Ali said ' Me , me , me ' . The police officer asked Ali what did the robber used to chop off the old lady's head and Ali replied by saying 'Fork and spoon a fork and spoon' . Then the police officer asked Ali what did the robber do with the woman's head after he had chopped it and Ali said 'Flush it away' . Then the police officer asked Ali if he wanted to go to the prison and he just replied kindly by saying
'Thank you'
********** The End **********
3.
One normal day , a man when to a hotel and asked if there was anymore rooms for him . The cashier simply said 'Ah ...... well , there's only one room left but one person has already died in that room' . The man needed that room for the night really much so he just said 'Oh ... well , I'll just have that room' . At midnight , he heard a voice saying 'I'm going to find you , I'm going to eat you' . He was sooo scared he smacked his head sooo hard that he died . The next day , another guy came in the hotel and asked for a room , the cashier just said 'There's only one room left for you but two people has died in that room' . The man just simply said 'Oh ... well , I'll just have that room' . At midnight , he heard a voice saying 'I'm going to find you , I'm going to eat you' . This man was sooo scared that he flushed himself down the toilet bowl ! The following day , a fat man came along to the hotel and asked the cashier whether there's a room for him to stay for the night and the cashier said 'There's only one room for you to stay for the night but three person has died in that room' . The fat man said 'Whatever , I'll just get that room for the night' . At midnight , he heard the same voice saying the same thing . This fat man was not afraid and he decided he'll get to the bottom of this himself . So he went to the living area of his room and saw a boy picking/digging his nose while saying 'I'm going to find you , I'm going to eat you' .
********** The End **********
4.
One day , three good friends went on a plane for a holiday trip to a country surrounded by islands . On the way to the country , the plane caught fire and crashed . Out of everyone in the plane , only the three good friends managed to survive . When they found each other they decided to explore the island . One went to explore the beach for the plane's food cargo and left over things they could make use of , one went to explore to forest of the island to find food like tomatoes and one went to explore the hills to see for any sign of land nearby . The one discovering the beach of the island found the Gennie's lamp and he was sooooo excited he shouted for all his friends on the island to come and see it . When they came , the guy who found the Gennie's lamp told him where he found it and what he thought they should do with it . (I suppose you guys know what to do when you find the Gennie's lamp , you rub it .) . That's what they did , they rubbed it . So , ya ...... the Gennie came out and thanked them for letting him out of the lamp . He also rewarded them with one wish each . The first guy started to think about his wife , his children and his warm + cosy house . So he said 'I would like to go back to my home , Mr .Gennie' so the Gennie sent his home with a snap of his finger . The second guy thought about his cool jaz car in his garage at his house , so he said 'I would like go home , Mr .Gennie' . So the Gennie sent him home with a breath from his mouth . The last guy looked all around the empty beach of the island and said 'I would like my two friends beside me , Mr .Gennie' . So the Gennie sent his two friends beside him with a blink of his eye and went away .
********* The End *********
5.
Two ghosts met and both chat about how they died.
1st ghost : How u died?
2nd ghost : I died of cold.
1st ghost : How does it feel when you're dying in cold?
2nd ghost : Actually, I was imprisoned in the refrigerator. Initially, I was shivering, then my whole body started to freeze, later I felt the whole world was dark and I died. Fortunately, I died with not much sufferings.
1st ghost : You're so pityful....
2nd ghost : How about you? How did u die?
1st ghost : I died from heart attack.
2nd ghost : I see, why did u have a heart attack?
1st ghost : Actually, I found out that my wife is having an affair with another man. One day, when I came back from work, saw a pair of man shoes outside my house. Then, I realized that the guy was in my house with my wife. When I rushed into the bedroom, my wife was alone. I must find where that bastard is hiding. So I searched the toilet, I ran downstairs, looked in the storeroom, but the bastard was not there. So, I ran upstairs and searched the wardrobe, but I found nothing. Because I was too tired of all that running,I got a heart attack and died.
2nd ghost : Why didn't you look for the bastard in the fridge? If you did, both of us were alive now !!
1st ghost : How u died?
2nd ghost : I died of cold.
1st ghost : How does it feel when you're dying in cold?
2nd ghost : Actually, I was imprisoned in the refrigerator. Initially, I was shivering, then my whole body started to freeze, later I felt the whole world was dark and I died. Fortunately, I died with not much sufferings.
1st ghost : You're so pityful....
2nd ghost : How about you? How did u die?
1st ghost : I died from heart attack.
2nd ghost : I see, why did u have a heart attack?
1st ghost : Actually, I found out that my wife is having an affair with another man. One day, when I came back from work, saw a pair of man shoes outside my house. Then, I realized that the guy was in my house with my wife. When I rushed into the bedroom, my wife was alone. I must find where that bastard is hiding. So I searched the toilet, I ran downstairs, looked in the storeroom, but the bastard was not there. So, I ran upstairs and searched the wardrobe, but I found nothing. Because I was too tired of all that running,I got a heart attack and died.
2nd ghost : Why didn't you look for the bastard in the fridge? If you did, both of us were alive now !!
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